Following in Bubba's Footsteps

I think I'm going to try to obtain a gun license for my dog Jasper because in his old age his bite might be a little less ferocious, his bark a little weaker, and lets just be honest he's too sophisticated and regal to ever claw someone to death. Therefore, in order to retain his guard dog status and his "doghood" (somewhat like manhood) he needs to find a different way to protect the house.

In the past a thought of a dog obtaining a gun license would seem ridiculous. I mean he doesn't talk, he druels, and occasionally he will pee in the house. But according to officials in Illinois this might be alright as long as Jasper can take his paw and scribble by the "X."

According to the family of two year old Bubba Ludwig, their little tot has obtained a gun license from the state of Illinois. His father filled out the application accurately describing his age, his height (2 feet tall), his weight, and all other relevant information. The state then approved the boy's application and is allowing him to use the 12 gauge shot gun his grandfather gave him.

Thankfully, the parents and grandparents of Bubba understand that a two year can not and should not use a gun. The gun given by his grandfather is being reserved for use until Bubba turns at least twelve and he can safely use it. However, just to make a point about the application process for a gun license, Bubba's parents decided to apply anyway. The process has proved to be superficial, laxed, and most importantly irresponsible.

While this is an embarassment for the state of Illinois, it truly makes you wonder what is next for guns in America. Although I agree sportsmen should be allowed to possess shotguns and rifles for hunting purposes, there is no need for semi-automatic weapons, or hand guns. We don't live in a world where militias protect the citezenry. We have a strong professional army and full police coverage everywhere in America. Having a handgun for personal protection has only proven to cause more harm than good.

Of course there are stories about how handguns have saved the lives of individuals who are being robbed, but the majority of people that own handguns do not know how to use them properly - leading to more injuries than would be caused without the gun. While most licensed owners are not two year olds like Ludwig, as displayed by shootings at Virginia Tech, mentally ill people (although supposedly restricted) can easily obtain a firearm. The application needs to become more thorough, studied, and most of all selective when deciding who can posses a firearm. Therefore, even if you do not agree that the type of gun sold should be limited to certain rifles and shotguns, hopefully you can agree that the license process should at least be more rigorous.

So when I get home, pet my dog on the head, and tell him good boy, I'll get that application rolling, strap a holster to his hip, and let him be a guard dog with some major firepower.